Taking a look at a tattooed lady (April 26)
By Chuck Doud
The Madera Tribune
I think Mrs. Doud and I may be among the few people left who have no intention of getting themselves tattooed. I know a lot of people who have tattoos, and it is their own business, but I am happy with just plain skin, and I think Mrs. Doud is, too.
The other day, I was watching a television program about global warming, and one of the speakers had obviously had a big tattoo around her neck, one of those that makes it look like you have plants growing in your underwear, and they are trying to get out. She had apparently just had the tattoo removed, but the red marks from the laser-burning were still there, and not only did she look unattractive, she also looked goofy.
I believe tattoos to be a fad, but they are a fad that is hard to throw away. For example, a few years ago, everybody wanted carpets on their floors, and then people decided they wanted wood floors instead. They tore up their perfectly good carpets and had wooden floors put down at great expense. One of these days, they will cover up those wood floors with carpets again.
That’s the way it is with fashion.
Long hair used to be in style for guys, but now most fellows wear it short, and some wear it glued straight up. You can always cut your hair off or let it grow out. But it’s harder getting rid of a tattoo, especially if you are going to appear on television and get your 15 minutes of fame at somebody else’s expense. Instead of leaving the impression that she was an expert on global warming, the formerly tattooed lady left an impression that she had just had her neck mutilated.
When people get themselves tattooed, they think it will be easy to get rid of if they get tired of it. But it won’t be easy. It will hurt.
I know some people say I already have tattoos, but it’s not so. They’re just wrinkles.
